Managing uncertainties of life

Uncertainty is a normal part of life rather coping with it can be difficult. When we resist uncertainty, we create unnecessary stress and anxiety, when we go, we can find inner peace even during the toughest times. There are two types of uncertainities comes in the life are - Uncertainity due to lack of knowledge and second is Uncertainity due to unpredictibility or randomness. Uncertainity exerts a strong pull on our ability to act, leaving us in a suspended waiting game. 

For example - With so much of uncertainity in the world, many retirees are anxious about their future. The glass reality is half empty for many who have no paychecks have some 25 to 30 years of runway in front of them. Many are asked to do the impossible - remain calm, cool and collected as they deal with great unknowns and navigate in the dark while making sure that they have enough money for the next 30 years in retirement. Living too long is both a blessing and a curse and comes with a heavy price tag. Trying to plan finances without an ending date is next to impossible. Yet, every retiree is faced with doing just that. The risk to a retiree is the combintion of investment and inflation. 

At certain times, events that unfold on a wider scale pliunge many people into uncertain situations at once like during covid period. This century has several theories which have described how high uncertainty can be threatening , motivating people to defend. It seems that people who had bad past experience  like being abused in the childhood  do have negative thoughts,  

It is to be noted that uncertainty is the only certainty and how to live with insecurity is the only security. Following are the strategies which can be quite helpful to cope with when we feel everything out of control -

1. Don't resist - Instead of resisting, we can practice acceptance. Because acceptance only allows us  to see the reality of the situation.To practice acceptance, surender resistance to a problematic situation alongwith the emotions. For example, if the marriage is found to be challenging. Instead of blaming or criticising the spouse, calmly accept your marriage for the time being. Accepting a situation  doesn't mean that it will never get better. Practicing acceptance in the face of dificulty is hard, but it is also the most effective way to move forward. 

2. Invest in yourself -  When we underinvest in our bodies, mind or spirits, we destroy our essential tools for leading our best lives. Don't be confused. Self care is not selfish. Avoid any sort of self-focus linked to stress, depression, anxiety and health problems like heart disease. It's not selfishness but self care and personal growth. 

3. Find healthy ways to comfort self - When we feel insecure and uncertain, our brain tries to rescue us by activating other dopamine systems to seek rewards by making temptations more tempting. Instead of turning to social media, alcohol, junk food, make a list of healthy ways to comfort youself. Such as go for a walk, watch a funny you tube video. These things appear to be small but enable us to be with the people we want to be. 

4. Don't believe in everything you think - The most essential stress- reduction technique is not to believe in everything you think. Instead of getting into every stressful thought, one can imagine the best possible scenario too. Sometimes we can find silverlining to replace our thoughts. This counters our natural tendency to overestimate risks and negative consequences. 

5. PAY ATTENTION - Even when it feels like everything is out of control, we can still control once we pay attention to. We can drop our negative thinking by attending to what is actually happening in our immer world, right here in the present. 

6. STOP LOOKING TO SOMEONE TO HELP YOU - Rescuiers tend to allow us to avoid taking responsibility for our own lives. Best way to cope with the uncertainty, we should stop complaining  When  we take responsibility, we acquire the false power of victimhood for the real power which comes from creating the life we want. '

7. FIND MEANING IN THE CHAOS -  When we see something that needs improvement, we look forward to what we can do and to be a part of the solution. Meaning and purpose are wellsprings of hope. Don't be left over with your misery while wait for the situation to resilve itself. 

Uncertainty is the refuge of hope. A lesson for all of us is that for every loss, there is victory, for every sadness, there is joy, and when you think you have lost everything, there is hope.

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